"Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot"

"All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl."

"Nothing is permanent in this wicked world - not even our troubles."

"Actors search for rejection. If they don't get it they reject themselves."

"Failure is unimportant. It takes courage to make a fool of yourself."

"I don't believe that the public knows what it wants; this is the conclusion that I have drawn from my career."

"We aim above the mark to hit the mark."

"The question is not, can they reason? Nor, can they talk? But, can they suffer?"

"Things could always be worse; for instance, you could be ugly and work in the Post Office."

"Women want mediocre men, and men are working hard to become as mediocre as possible."

"A bad beginning makes a bad ending."

"We the willing, led by the unknowing, are doing the impossible for the ungrateful. We have done so much, with so little, for so long, we are now qualified to do anything, with nothing."